A week in review

Dear Andrew and Abby,

Well, it was another exciting week and weekend in our house. Let's talk about Andrew's excitement first.



That picture is about three days in to the healing process. I was a little too...upset...to think about photographing the evidence of the crime until then. You see, I've had a love-hate relationship with day care in general, but one of the staff members in the school-agers class at our current daycare in particular. I won't mention his real name - let's just call him Barney. Barney is some undetermined, but fairly young (19-ish?) age. As such, he is a lot of fun for Andrew, but also not exactly experienced in the care of children, or exactly the most responsible person I've ever met. Over the summer, he showed Andrew how to jump from the top of the play set (he jumped because all of the 8-year-olds were standing below and egging him on). He was also the instigator of the rough-housing that led to Barney pushing another boy and causing him to land on Andrew's toe full force which caused the toenail to turn black and threaten to fall off. Needless to say, Barney has not been my favorite. This week, Barney and the rest of the boys were playing and Barney shoved a plastic basket into Andrew's face to keep him from getting away. The lip looked awful. The best part of it all? Barney wasn't there as an employee - he no longer works at our day care. He was just there visiting. You know, to see his friends. The eight-year-olds. Okay, that's not fair or nice. Barney is a nice kid. I can call him a kid because I'm old and I'm a mom. He is nice and he plays with the kids and actually interacts with them instead of just ignoring them. All of that is great, and I really do like that there are guys who work at the day care. I just, you know, wish there was a little more maturity to go along with all the fun.

As for Abby, she is growing up faster than I can keep up with. She had her first play date at a friend's house this weekend. She was invited to Abi's house (that's pronounced Abby-Eye, as opposed to Abby-Why), along with seven other play mates. I wasn't sure if I was expected to stay or not, but the other parents were all planning to leave. I told Abby that the other mommies and daddies were going, but that I could stay if she wanted. Her reply? "No, Mommy. Leave." And then she turned back to playing. I was dismissed, just like that. At three, she has already learned that it's not cool to have Mom around when she's with her friends. Oh, are we in trouble come junior high...

Easter recap, new obsessions, and Oh My God, this has to stop

Dear Andrew & Abby,

Well, we made it through Easter. I know! Hard to believe. We actually stayed home this year, which is unusual for us. We usually go to Papa and Grandma Dottie's house, which is also fun. But this was one of the few times we stayed at our house and went to our church and the Easter Bunny came to our house! On Saturday, there was the Easter party at church and I think you two had a really good time. You made hand print lillys and I am still proudly displaying them. Since they aren't relying on Mommy for watering, they will probably do better than our house plant.

Sunday morning, you found the baskets that the Bunny left for you and you were both VERY excited. Andrew said he LOVES Easter!! I think that is mostly due to the fact that there was an umbrella in his basket and he has been pining for an umbrella for a long time now. I've never seen a kid so excited to get an umbrella.

This week, he has been spending a lot of time studying the weather forecast to determine that it might rain and he should really take his umbrella today. On the way home from school today (it was a rainy day and he did take the umbrella), he offered to go and fetch the mail - IN THE RAIN - if Daddy hadn't already picked it up. Of course that offer was rescinded once we heard thunder and saw lightning, but that's okay.

You also both had some other junk in your baskets that cost 50 cents or a dollar or so a piece (the Easter Bunny told me that). Yes, you two are fairly spoiled in quantity, but luckily, you aren't concerned too much with quality or cost (at least not yet).

Church was good and you were reasonably well-behaved. Of course Mommy (and the other Mommies and Daddies involved) did not make the best decision in allowing the Trinity Gang to all sit together in a pew.

It felt like a really long time until Pastor invited all the kids to the front for the Children's Sermon and then you were off to the nursery for Children's Church. We are so blessed to be part of a church that accepts and embraces families with small kids the way ours does. It helps that we all sit where we're supposed to - back left corner. That's the Noisy Corner. Most people know that that's not where you want to sit if you actually want to be able to hear the entire service.

Because we stayed home, and because Mommy likes to go crazy every once in a while, we invited people over to our house to eat Sunday afternoon. Mommy loves to have friends over and to cook lots of food. So it's a good fit. Of course, the problem is that we do not have a large house. And our not large house is not even very well designed for entertaining. But that's never been known to stop us. Also, we have a lot of friends! We are SO popular! Mommy tried to keep it small - so I just invited the Russells (family of 4), the Fishers (4), the Stenbergs (4), the Herrins (4). We're all such tidy two-kid families (for now!!). But even with that, do the math with me...4 times 5 is...20! Very good! TWENTY people. Of course, half of them are kids, so that's not too bad. Oh, and wait! We also invited the Wallaces - there's just three of them. Then I got word that the Russells were also bringing Don's mom and dad - who live in town and who we know. That's cool. And then we also invited the Campbells (4) - because we just really like them and I wanted them to come. And they did. The Herrins and Wallaces already had other plans, but everyone else came. So did you keep track? That's 22 people altogether. It was so much fun! I cooked a Big Ass Ham (over 19 pounds!), and made special Easter Egg Potatoes that I love. Everyone else brought something and we had a great time. You kids got to play, the grown-ups got to talk, and there was lots and lots of food. I don't remember an Easter when I have ever felt more content and at peace, and surrounded by friends, which is all I could hope for you for any day in your life.

And then Sunday night came.


And Monday night.


And Tuesday night.


And tonight.


I don't even have the words to describe how awful bedtime has been. We've had good structure, followed our routine, and Mommy and Daddy have worked together. And yet...


Fits. Screaming. Throwing. Crying. Defiance. Threats. Hitting and kicking. Punishment. Spanking (yes, I said it. Spanking. On. Your. Butt.).


Last night, I actually looked up the application for SuperNanny. That's how bad it is. I guess the good - and bad - news is that I don't think you're bad enough for us to make it on to Jo's schedule. Last night, Mommy was in tears by the end of the night. Tonight, I was afraid. Afraid I was close to losing control. Daddy took over and I mostly hid in the living room. Neither of us quite knows what to do. We've heard it all and we've tried it all. How can I possibly continue to simply put Abby back in her bed each time she gets up when I don't even make it out of her room before she's on my heels? Are we really going to have to throw or give away Andrew's toys before he will give up his stubbornness and stop with the back talk? You two are only three and eight. If it's this bad now, I am really frightened of how ill-equipped I will be to handle either of you as teenagers. I can't even talk about it anymore. We need help. Real help. Not the unsolicited parenting book advice kind of help. We need SuperNanny or someone willing to pretend to be her for us. And I just don't know where to get that kind of help.


If only we had some kind of umbrella-wielding super-hero who specializes in sleep-resistant children. And no, the Penguin is NOT who I have in mind. I think adding nightmares to our already stressful nighttime would finally push Mommy right over the edge.

I love you I love you I love you. No matter how frazzled I feel trying to get you to sleep, once you finally give up the fight and close your eyes, I go in to your rooms, snuggle on you, smell your sleepiness, and kiss your cheeks and heads and hands. I adore you. Now, please.

GO TO SLEEP.

love,
Mommy

Weekend, what weekend?

Dear Andrew & Abby,


Well, now that we've made it to Wednesday, we've almost recovered from last weekend. Of course, we've also been out doing things every night so far this week, so we haven't completely recovered.


This weekend we celebrated Andrew's birthday. We also attended the annual Cub Scout Blue & Gold dinner and Mommy participated in the Chili Cook-off at church (obviously, neither group consulted our family calendar before scheduling their events). And we had to finish up Andrew's Science Fair project. Gosh, am I forgetting anything? Mommy felt like a whirling dervish in the kitchen Saturday and Sunday - we made a corn casserole for the Blue & Gold (Grandma Jamie did most of that, thank goodness!), chili AND vegetable soup for the Cook-Off, and meatballs and roasted red pepper dip for the party at our house. Whew! And I haven't cooked since then! But really, Mommy loves to cook, so I had fun doing all of that, I just got a little stressed about trying to do it all at the same time!


Your Grandma Jamie (Poppy Ted had to work, so he couldn't come) and Grandma Dottie and Papa all came to visit for the birthday, and they got to go to the Blue & Gold dinner and to the Chili Cook-Off with us and that was fun. I'm not sure if they had a good time doing all of that or not, but it was nice that they got to go to Andrew's Cub Scout event. It's hard because we live about three hours away from both sets of grandparents, so they miss out on a lot of the stuff that other grandmas and grandpas get to go to. The Blue & Gold includes a Father-Son Cake Bake, which you and Daddy didn't enter this year, but there were lots of fantastic cakes to see. At the end of the evening, the winning cakes in each of several categories get auctioned off first, and all the other cakes are given away in a raffle. There was one cake in particular that Andrew had his eye on - a volcano cake made by a boy in his den. He put a LOT of raffle tickets in for that cake. It occurred to me that if we took home a cake from the dinner, I wouldn't have to make one (as I was planning to do that night after we got home - because Mommy had lost her mind somewhere when we were cleaning up the house). I got more raffle tickets for Andrew and we put them in for the volcano cake, but I still worried we would not end up with the volcano cake and Andrew's dreams - and Mommy's - would be crushed. Then the auction started and there was a beautiful tropical island cake up for bid. In another moment of insanity - and desperation to not have to bake a cake - Mommy bid on it, and won. Woo hoo! No baking! So when the raffle started, I was actually hoping we would not win the volcano cake - we no longer needed it. Except Andrew really did want it, so luckily, we won it. And then one of the last cakes went up for raffle, and they called Grandma Dottie's name. So we went home with three cakes. That is a lot of cake - and a lesson in Be Careful What You Wish For.

The Chili Cook-Off was fun for Mommy - I got to make my Chili Con Cheri and my yummy favorite Old World Vegetable Soup, but I don't think it was as much fun for either of you. Andrew was a big help at my table and helped hand out soup samples and Abby mostly sat with Grandma Jamie, so I don't think you hated it, but it was probably not the highlight of your weekend. Sadly, Mommy did not win Best in either category, but I did win Most Original Soup Recipe and Best Table Presentation. The funny part is that your daddy decorated that table in less than five minutes using leftover decorations from our Fiesta! VBS last year. He's so clever!


After the Chili Cook-Off was over, we went back to our house and got ready for your party. Originally, we were not going to have two pirate parties, but that's what we ended up with. Saturday night and Sunday morning, I finished up the new treasure hunt clues - I made TEN this time, since five didn't seem to be enough the last time. They turned out great, and I have to say, I do think our tricks to making them look authentic work really well. We had SO many more people at this party than we did your first party. Which is great and I think you had a wonderful time. The kids seemed to enjoy the treasure hunt and you got some very nice gifts.



And we all survived the entire weekend! Whew!

Love,
Mommy

Missing pirates

Dear Andrew & Abby,

This weekend, we had Andrew's birthday party - the first of two. Why two? Well, we've talked about this before, but your Mommy is a touch crazy in the head...and that's pretty much the reason for lots of strange things that go on in our house. You see, Mommy's thinking went like this:

Andrew's birthday is February 27th, so his birthday party would normally be the weekend of the 24th/25th. Except we already have things going on both Saturday (Cub Scout Blue & Gold Dinner) and Sunday (Chili Cook-off at church, which I am entering). The party will have to be moved up a week to the 17th (at the point when these thoughts were happening, that was about a week and a half away - your Mommy is a bit of a procrastinator). There are 24 students in Andrew's second grade class. Invitations taken to school have to be given to everyone in the class, so no one gets hurt feelings. We also have family who will come from Illinois and church family, which could potentially add 40 more people (only slightly more adults than kids). That's too much to deal with in one weekend, plus we only bought enough pirate-themed party favors for 12 kids - I hope we don't have more than that come from school! - and they were kind of expensive. We should split it up and only deal with the kids from school (who I don't know and whose parents won't be there to help wrangle their kids) on the 17th. Then we'll have family come and church family over on the 25th after the chili cook-off. It's just family and we'll keep it low-key, no problem.

That's what I thought. Funny, huh?!? I think Daddy tried to talk me out of this whole mess, but I didn't really listen. This is the point in the story where your Daddy, if he was reading this, would laugh and say "Hah! See! I was right!" And then he would dance around and point and laugh at me some more. Maybe not really, but he does that in my head for sure.

So we sent Pirates of the Carribbean invitations to school for the 17th, this past Saturday (except we ran out of Pirates invitations and when Mommy went to Wal-Mart they didn't have any more, so some of the invitations were Disney Cars). Friday night we cleaned the house and Mommy made some wicked cool treasure hunt clues (photos here). Saturday morning we hung up our pirate decorations and put together the treasure chest goodies. We only had two RSVP's, but I've found that is not unusual for kids' birthday parties. It's nice to know there are other parents out there who are just as scatterbrained about responding as I usually am (but I'm trying to be better, and you should both live above and beyond my example!). So we didn't really know how many kids to expect. Ashley's mom called and talked to Daddy on Friday to see if we were still having the party, what with ALL THE SNOW coming. Yep, that's right, MORE SNOW! I don't want to turn this diary into the weather channel or anything, so I won't go on and on about it, but we did get about four more inches of snow. On Saturday. Party day. After the dumping we took last week, I think the sight of more snow must have freaked people out and made them scared to leave home because only two kids showed up: Jonah and Ashley. Yes, two. One, two. Daddy and I felt pretty bad for Andrew, but Andrew didn't seem to notice or care. Jonah was actually way more concerned about it than Andrew. Still, the three of you had a good time playing swords and looking for the treasure. I made five clues and that apparently was about a third of what I should have made - the hunt was such a HUGE hit that you took turns re-hiding and re-finding the clues several times. We had Pirate cake and you played Pin the Flag on the Pirate Ship. You had fun and got a couple of presents. Daddy bought you a bow with suction cup arrows (grrr!) which you loved (double grrr!), but it broke on Sunday (yay!).

So after your friends left, we started talking about the party for next weekend. You said you wanted another Pirate cake (thank you, Kroger for saving me from making a cake!) and wanted to do the treasure hunt again and the pin the flag game. Basically, you wanted to do the same thing all over again. I told your dad that and he said, "Yeah, that's what I figured we were doing." Oh. I guess Mommy was the only one who thought next weekend's party would be just a nice get-together where the kids ran and played and the adults sat and talked, kind of like most of our gatherings, except then we'd have cake and ice cream. So now I needed to think party thoughts. Oh, and we didn't have invitations! Which we needed to deliver the next day, on Sunday, at church!

Since the treasure clues turned out so cool, I thought we'd do that for the invitations. Saturday night, I made the invitations. Sunday, we passed them out...Now I have to order another cake and make a trip to the party store to buy more of the expensive treasure hunt goodies that I was trying to avoid buying and we have way too much going on this weekend, which I was also trying to avoid. But it's going to be fun. Mommy might have to make some Pirate Sangria to help her actually relax and enjoy it, but it will be great!

Oh, I also forgot to mention that on Friday night, Mommy's best friend, Jody, called. Jody is Fairy Godmother to both of you, part of our church family, and Zack and Alyssa's mom. Zack is best friends with and lives next door to Jonah, who is in your class at school and one of the two kids who showed up. We didn't invite Zack to the first party, because he is coming to the second party (you see what a bad idea this was? Why didn't someone stop me?!). But Jonah's mom called Jody, who didn't know about either party yet because we hadn't decided all the details, to see what Zack was getting for Andrew for his birthday. Jody called me because she was concerned that there was some issue between our family and hers that she didn't know about and wanted to know what was wrong that caused us not to invite Zack to the party. Ohhh....noooo....Luckily, Jody likes me, and once I explained it all - and apologized as many times as I could in the span of three minutes for making her worry - I think she forgave me for my stupidness. Erg. Mommy can be so dumb sometimes!

So let's make our goal for next year's birthday to just have one party that gets mostly planned at least two weeks ahead of time. You might have to help.

love,
Mommy